My suffering as it turns out was in large part self-chosen. When confronted with life altering information and circumstances itâ€™s easy to get wrapped up in yourself. For me it was, â€œIâ€™ve lost my purpose in life and Iâ€™ll never be a Special Forces Operator again, my health is failing, Iâ€™m being mistreated, and no-one understands me.â€ If you donâ€™t know what a victim sounds like the previous sentence provides a good example.
I finally realized it was nobodyâ€™s job to take responsibility for my life, that was on me and me alone. I decided to take ownership of my life again. It occurred to me that absolutely everything that had ever occurred in my life was a result of my own doing, and if there was something going on in my life that I didnâ€™t like it would be up to me to fix it.
If you want it you have to earn it, plain and simple. That realization is the birthplace of our personal responsibility and there is real liberation to be found in that. The freedom found in taking full ownership of your life is a decision. Life is really about decisions, every decision we make is an opportunity to learn, to grow, to serve, and to love or to do the opposite. If our decisions are not producing the outcomes we desire then itâ€™s time to analyze what weâ€™re doing and why. My transformation and healing sprung out of the decision to commit to live a life worth living again.
More details appear in TALES FROM THE BLAST FACTORY: A Brain Injured Special Forces Green Beretâ€™s Journey Back From The Brink. These lessons were paid for in blood, it is my honor to give them to you. What I once thought was the worst thing in my life is now one of the best things in my life, it can be the same for you.